Fox and Friends has a long list of things to fear, including but not limited to:
• Anyone with skin that isn’t a shade of cottage cheese
• The LGBTQIA community
• Vaginas, and those who own one
• Universal healthcare and education
• Any holiday that isn’t Christmas
But much like shooting fish in a barrel, or teargassing women and children at the border, raising hysteria over these concerns has gotten to be almost too easy.
Surely there are some new baseless fears they can dress up with outrageous lies for their viewers—perhaps some fears regarding the worst narcotic of all, cannabis?
On Monday, your racist aunt’s favorite show examined the case of a 12-year-old who handed out cannabis-infused gummies to six members of his gym class at his school located in—take a guess—Florida.
The gummies contained a total of 100 milligrams of THC for the entire package, and because it’s never a good idea to give cannabis to anyone unknowingly, but especially not children, ever, the results were predictable: Five children were taken to the hospital with stomach pain, dizziness, and nausea.
They all made a full recovery, of course, because they were cannabis gummies and not Tide Pods, and it’s a great reminder that cannabis and all cannabis edibles should be stored the same as firearms, located securely away from children and pets.
The preteen gummy pusher now faces seven felony charges for possession and distribution of cannabis, which brings us to Fox and Friends, who turned what could have been a valuable teaching moment into a fear-mongering cavalcade of what Fox News trades in best—blatant lies.
The hosts spoke with Polk County Sheriff Grady Judd (again—FLORIDA) about the dangers of THC and how it kills. Vox shared the exchange, which started off as surreal, then made a left turn at Ludicrous Avenue on its way to South Bullshitville.
Host Brian Kilmeade, who is always trying very, very hard, started the discussion with his thoughtful insights to what he had heard from someone, somewhere, at some point.
“No one talks about this — THC is addicting,” Kilmeade said. “I know so many people, they say they were told one thing, and they end up getting addicted to it. That is an addicting substance. There is a price to pay for pot.”
Sheriff Judd expressed his wholehearted agreement.
“There absolutely is a price to pay for pot,” he said. “You know, I spent my entire life in law enforcement, and a lot of it investigating traffickers of drugs, and it is not a minor, nonviolent felony. It is ruining families and killing people every day across the United States, and we stand here in denial thinking it is not a gateway drug.”
“You don’t start on cocaine — you probably start with marijuana and it leads to other things, right?” asked host Ainsley Earhardt.
“That is absolutely right,” Judd replied. “And still today we have a meth problem across this state and country. If someone is in possession of meth, they’re in possession of marijuana because it kinda cuts the edge of the meth.
And then they use the marijuana and the meth and they go out and kill themselves or overdose or kill someone else.”
Okay, let’s sum up:
Cannabis is a gateway drug which is ruining families and killing people each and every day in these here fine United States, and using cannabis use will lead to using meth, then using more cannabis to offset the effects of the meth, which, of course, in turn leads to more meth use, and then you kill yourself, or others, or maybe both, all while we stand here in denial, selling gummies.
Happy now, Peter Pothead?
Patently false information such as this is exactly why cannabis education is critical, as millions of viewers of this exchange could now well be operating under the idea that cannabis-infused gummies are killing people every day. Which just isn’t possible—unless you choke on one.